Anyway there were these two ostriches, A and B.

Of course I could give them cuddly names, but that would be a wee bit anthropomorphic, don't you think? And, as far as I know, nobody has an ostrich as a pet.

Ostrich A buried his head deep, deep deep into the sand of the Saharan desert, not too far from Marakesh - and suddenly found he was breathing hot air from Australia, somewhere between Alice Springs and Broken Hill.

Now you might ask how Ostrich A knew that was where his beak had emerged, but I am afraid that information is confidential.

"Bugger this for a lark!" said Ostrich A, pulling back from his brief Australian experience. "That was surreal!"

"It's CGI mate," said Ostrich B. "They can do anything nowadays with CGI."

"Well, this is all is a bit extreme. The Sahara isn't even opposite the Australian Outback on the globe."

"Doesn't matter. Computers can change all that. If they wanted to, they could get rid of all the other ostriches in the world, and turn us two into avatars."

"Avatars? Could we fly? I've always thought it odd we couldn't fly."

"No. Nothing romantic, A. We'll be converted into digital dots or something like that. It will help solve global warming, apparently. Let's face it," summed up Ostrich B. "We are doomed."

"It may never happen," said Ostrich A, burying his neck into the sand even deeper than before.