I have been a bad sleeper since I was sent to boarding school at the age of nine.  One of the first thing I discovered was that we were not Meant to go and pee after Lights Out.  It wasn't a School Rule, just Frowned Upon.  It drew unwelcome attention to yourself.

I was terrified of needing to pee - so I couldn't relax until I had.  I waited until everyone appeared to be sleep, the crept put of the dormitory and along the endless corridor to the lavatories.  By the time I got back I sometimes convinced myself I needed to pee again.  In one dormitory, I took to peeing out the window, until one night I imagined I heard voices below.

Eventually, I was "caught" on one of my trips to the loo, and given a pot.  Soon I learnt how to slither out of the bed, and use the pot without making a tincking sound.

I explained my dilemma to my French and Music teacher.  "Le peau sur la pot" he quipped (but getting the words' genders right, even if I haven't here).  Later, during a piano lesson, he put his hand on my knee and told me I was a beautiful person, but I don't think it went any further.