I am not feeling guilty at the moment. No warning voice last night, telling me I am an arsehole and my life is about to fall apart. Months of therapy seem to be paying off. Dope withdrawal at last feels as if was a good idea.
Of course this may only be a temporary remission. Guilt has been a good false friend, cousin of self-pity, who can make me feel quite comfortable.
Meanwhile my sister's guilt is almost out of control. Her constant need to be a hero to my mother is, I really believe, bringing her to the brink of a nervous breakdown. Any suggestion I make of easing her "burden" (eg hiring a second nurse/helper for my mum once a fortnight to cover for the weekend-off of Maria) is met almost with resentment. My sister apparently craves the martyrdom.
The only way she can self-justify being away from my mother is (post retirement, freelance, journalist) working. Also she fantasises that she desperately needs the money - which is bullshit.
She is off for a week's holiday on Saturday - bookended by vists to my mother of course. I thought I was helping by not going to a family wedding and seeing my mother instead. But no. Sis needs her sacrifice.
rowtheboat


Don't expect it all to disappear and never return. There will be days.
But more days feeling positive then feeling down are signs you're moving forward. Good signs.
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